Britain’s Got Talent…Apparently

So there I was flicking through The Sun when I came across this:

It’s a sneaky look behind the scenes of the Britain’s Got Talent auditions in Manchester.

There’s a picture of a guy balanced on a ball, twirling a hula hoop; there’s a performing dog, two women dressed as nuns and finally, the one staple no ‘talent’ show can do without: the Elvis impersonator (jumpsuit Elvis). Britain’s Got Talent returns in the spring. Personally, I’m more of a Gong Show girl. Hugely popular in the 1970s, the US show’s most infamous amateur act was two teenagers licking popsicles – I kid you not. Anyway, here’s a taster of the series (no popsicles though):


Bizarre isn’t it? Beats anything Simon Cowell’s come up with.

Today I am mostly lovin’ – Bravo’s Starsky and Hutch repeats. David Soul and Paul Michael Glaser’s chemistry is to die for.

Today I am mostly hatin’ – WAGs on my TV. 

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22 Responses to Britain’s Got Talent…Apparently

  1. Unknown says:

    that poor guy ! he was doing well and the host was taking the spotlight !

  2. Nomura-Taylor says:

    Nice moves ! Aah the gong show. I was always a fan of "opportunity knocks". The original series with Hewie Green. No doubt I just spelled his name wrong, sorry if I did ! Theres a few things like that here in Japan, but they tend to go in for slapstick and comedy falls here though !

  3. Coops - says:

    Thanks for the comments guys! You know what I always think of when it comes to Japanese TV? Firstly, Monkey (with original Pigsy Toshiyuki Nishida) but secondly, 1980s series Tarrant On TV – specifically, the cult weekly Endurance segment. Maddest TV EVER!

  4. famous says:

    no wonder you picked WAGS tohate!  didn\’t  fancy commenting on the fallout from the footy?seriously coops to see a great team make such a hash and fight among themselves do\’s them no credit.wenger seems to be loading it onto theo walcott(do\’sn\’t know where he likes to play was one explanation)i\’ve had the lurgi but would have liked to talk sooner .not 100% now but gettin there .sorry iam doing this on your blog will have to leave my email sometime so you can tell me off for crowing(as if).

  5. Coops - says:

    Hello famouseccles – we\’ve all had the lergies. Hope you\’re feeling better mate. Well I was expecting abuse from Totts fans, and I got it. Still, it\’s been a long time coming – 1999 to be exact – we had a good run. I don\’t know what was worse; the in-fighting or the result. Credit where it\’s due, you out-played us. We\’ll do you in the League though! 🙂

  6. Unknown says:

    people say that they can sing or dance i would like to see people that can sing or dance or hear them other wise that isnt talent is it people just say that to get on a show people just talk a load of trash and rubbish that is what i say and they do you get more talent from watching comdey now that is talent and it is

  7. Peter says:

    I\’ve just watchd some of them tasters. These kind of shows are what I call "Trash TV" and they insult the intelligence of the viewing public. Ok, there is the view of it just being a bit of fun, but lets have some quality fun, not cheap puns like the two girls with the popsicles. You and I could have thought that up. Yes, there is talent in Britain but I guess the real talent in Britain or anywhere are far too good for these TV Producers and Executives that make trash tv.

  8. Coops - says:

    Hello (no name), love the passion but this is a PG-rated blog. No profanity allowed. I have edited out the offending word(s). 🙂
    (no name)I can\’t believe we\’re all going to be subjected to more of this rubbish.  In theory I\’m well up for the idea, giving unknown artists the chance to showcase their talents and possibly get the break they\’ve been hoping for, but that is a far cry from what we\’ll actually get.  When is someone who has the power to decide going to wake up to the fact that a hell of a lot of people think this is absolute sh**e.  There is so much available air time on TV these days, why isn\’t there a serious talent search for artists and performers outside of todays watered down pop culture.  The UK is teaming with unsigned musicians who are actually really good at what they do, but they won\’t get a look in here.  Britain has got talent, loads in fact, but I doubt you\’ll see that much on this show. I have the same issue with Big Brother.  It would be quite cool to stick a load of intellient people with contrasting opinions and beliefs in a house together, and see what intelligent conversation and debate resulted.  Again, this is not the reality of how it pans out.  What we actually get is a bunch of self obsessive morons, most of whom thing the way to win an argument is to shout the loudest.  What a waste of time.  It all comes down to money.  It\’s the idiots at home that spend all the money on the phone voting that ensure this is the future of TV in our country.  If you\’ve got money to spare why don\’t you give it to charity you fools, theres more going on in the world than what you see on T4.(

  9. famous says:

    just one question  no-name\’\’can you trust any phone-in result these days??\’\'(blue peter etc?) other than that love the sentiment.

  10. Nikki says:

    Everyone has been saying about real talent on these telent[less] shows. The problem is, when real talent actually does come along, they\’re screwed over over the \’pretty people\’. The people who will sell CD\’s of artificial voices because they wear mini\’s and will gladly strip if asked. And if real talent actually do make their way to a huge record deal, they become sellouts and normally change completely (*cough*FOB*cough*) and become so mainstream that you don\’t want to listen to them anymore as they aren\’t original anymore.
    Oh, I also hate WAGs. I hate any form of \’celebrity\’ A lister as, being honest, they\’re all complete idiots. It\’s the people who are popular in various communities but not actually famous who should be allowed to set an example in todays world, not the likes of Britney Spears and Cheryl Cole (is that right?). People like the two lovely women from Robots in Disguise are my inspiration, brutally honest and actually give a damn about their fans whilst doing their own thing! *loves Sue, Dee & Android* (Please never turn mainstream!)
    Rant over! Honest!

  11. SUE says:

    I went to see the auditions of BGT in Birmingham last night, and the acts were AWFUL, there wasnt one that I would have 100% put forward. The judges were great but the star of the show was a Ian Roysey (hope i\’ve got that right) who compared the evening, he was hilarious & would have won hands down!! Some of these \’acts\’ just looked terrible, & should never have been put through to this stage,it was embarassing watching them,if this is Britain\’s talent,then God help us!!!

  12. Dee says:

    You have to listen to a load of crap before you find quality.
    otherwise we would not have leona lewis to rave about!
    I believe the voting public have to shoulder some of the blame too – as its them that are \’selecting\’ these people!
    the true talent will get a \’leg up\’ via reality tv they just need the opportunity
    you quickly forget the likes of will young, kelly clarkson, lemar, fantasia, rubin studdard (they won american idol) all have careers via reality tv.

  13. gail says:

    Don\’t be too hard on those who take part in  BGT as thay have been messed around since November now. Believe it or not you are kept waiting until the very last minute (until 10pm on the day before the last day of filming in your area) before you know if you are no longer on the short list or not. If not being able to tell your boss if you will be at work or filming the next day could lose you your job then you have to choose between the show or your job. For most of us there is no choice as entering this competition was a laugh at the beginning. It is only when you are told you have been shortlisted that you even think of it as a serious idea. Even then you do expect to be dealt with in a professional manner if not a sensitive one. WRONG! You quickly become aware you are dealing with an organisation who does not have any respect for those it deals with ( including the poor, largely unpaid researchers and runners that actually deal with the public ) and really does not care. Their whole attitude is "their are plenty of others who are ready to take your place". The act I am involved in never expected to win but it is good to know we are not rubbish enough to be embarrasing. BGT learn to treat people with respect as we pay your wages!

  14. gail says:

    By the way, if you are wondering about my name it is because they couldn\’t, even in a brewery!

  15. Tina - says:

    I agree with \’Party Organiser\’. Our group would love viewers to know the truth behind BGT. Our 1st audition was in November in front of a single producer. After a 5 hour wait outside in the cold, we had to audition as soon as we entered the building – no warm-up, in and out within 20 minutes. We thought they hadn\’t got through to round 2 until we were contacted and told we\’d been shortisted. Then, with the final London round 2\’s getting ever nearer, more calls telling us to keep 4/5/6 Feb free. We were kept waiting until midnight last night – still being told that producers were making the final decisions for the auditions today. We are a mix of adults and teenagers, we had to arrange performance licences for the under 16s in the group at perilously short notice (Monday) to the annoyance of our council (who tell me the same thing has been going on across national LEAs), they all needed medicals yesterday in order for the licences to be processed, and we had to make tentatitive arrangements for travel and employement leave for all adults concerned.But it was all a waste of time. The poor researchers at BGT do their best, but the high and mighty producers just don\’t make the decisions about who is going to audition for Simon Cowell etc until the last minute. If you look at other forums on the net, you will see that a large number of people got about 24hours notice for this round. The third round last year reportedly involved 126 acts waiting in a room for 12 hours with no refreshments while the judges decided who would go on the live show. BGT did eventually appologise for this, but if the organisation that has gone on so far this year is anything to go by, I feel for the people who get through to that round this year.Frankly we are now relieved to be out of it having read the horror stories from other auditionees on the chat forums.And finally, this is not sour grapes, we took our audition as seriously as we do the many others we take part in. We were properly prepared, which is more than can be said for some that actually got through.We are semi-professional, experienced performers, and not just out to get famous. We saw this as an opportunity for exposure for what we do AND OUR TALENTS. We expected to be treated properly, instead we feel our eagerness and ambition has been taken advantage of, we have never experienced and audition as disorganised and disrespectful as this. We cannot for the life of us work out what their criteria is for choosing the acts that go through to the celebrity judges, it seems entirely random. It\’s about time British Television change they way they make these shows – there are thousands of truly telented people out there who really deserve a bit of air time to give their careers a push in the right direction. Instead they seem intent on humiliting vulnerable people, those who are emotionally or mentally troubled and believe themselves to be gifted, instead of highlighting the wealth of talent that is under their noses.Now there\’s a rant!Pink

  16. Unknown says:

    totally agree with Pink and Party Organiser
    I did an interview which was positive at my first audition had 1 call confirming my details and then nothing its all so up in the air that you have no idea if your thru or not I actually went to the audition at the Hackney Empire and spoke to the director who interviewed me he was very nice but it "Wasnt his department" he took my name and said someone would ring me Im still waiting. A massive shame as I had been rehearsing my 2 minutes everyday since November and I had a brilliant act which was going to poke fun at there boss Mr Cowell I wish they had sent me a letter before Xmas (which was said at the auditions)
    if anyone from BGT is reading this please next year please give us more correspondence

  17. lozy says:

    i went to britans got talent
    but i didnt get through
    my cousin also went on
    neither did she

  18. katie lil me 21 says:

    why do they think that that is entertainment?? last years got talent pulled out one decent act. i dont think theyll find a new paul potts this year!! and lost is fantastic

  19. TC says:

    No doubt they have already chosen their winner, the other acts are chosen because they supposedly make good tele, not because of their talent, and the whole thing is an elaborate fix. Few of the really talented ones get through the process. Also, acts are being \’red carpeted\’ through the system. If you look at the comments of auditionees on other forums you will see that some were "invited" to audition in front of Simon Cowell etc without having had a stage 1 audition (or even having made an application by the deadline) and some were in and out of their auditions and not made to wait hour upon hour like other people. There is a string quartet in the competition who are in because they played at the X factor after show party. The whole thing is corrupted, and they are treating most of the auditionees really badly too. They are trying to get an angle on auditionees when they are interviewed, trying to find if they have a sob story that will make good tele, the sadder your story and the quirkier your act the more they want you. That\’s not a talent show. The viewers should know the truth, but the tabloids don\’t think any of this is news worthy.

  20. bev says:

    i have only just see buffy the show my son had it on tv on day and i got hoked iv see all of buffy and loved it now looking forward to be seeing angel hope its as good and hope spikes in it

  21. Tia says:

    I actually think reality tv shows that look for talent are really good. They help people that have extraordinary talents show everyone what they can do. Not everyone is lucky enough to get picked up by an agent. Also, there are lots of people who may get spotted by the judges and asked to go and audition, but remember you need more than 1 yes to get through. Also I doubt a winner is already picked. What would the point be in that? They could save all the money they spend on studios, and guests and costumes etc and put it towards that persons career. Plus each of the judges expected Rhydian to win the X factor, but Leon did. And lots of people would have voted for that little girl, Connie, on Britains got Talent if they based their votes on the best sob story or quirkiest act. Who fits this most, a cute little girl, singing songs that most adults would struggle to sing, or a middle aged opera singer. Obvioulsy the most talented won that! Paul Potts.
    And I don\’t know what newspaper you read, because I have read plenty of articles about this. And to say they don\’t think it\’s important is quite silly, newspapers print anything that will make trouble for a certain programme or celebrity, and get people buying their paper. It\’s probably because most people don\’t really know what to believe out of newspapers nowadays, that a big fuss hasn\’t been kicked up.
    And as for them auditionees, I only really watch the auditions becuase of the hilarity of it all. It\’s the best comedy on TV, and no one can say we are being nasty laughing at these people, they actually choose to audition, they aren\’t forced into it. And the really awful ones get fame anyway, which is obviously all they want, as they are hopeless, and can hardly believe they could be pop artists, or perform in front of the Queen.

  22. Tia says:

    Honestly, Pink, you do sound bitter. You can\’t stop saying how you\’re glad your not through to the next round – which can\’t be true because other wise, you would never have auditioned, and are obviously not that ambitious. I want to be a poet or author when I\’m older, and I would give 12 hours of my time in a room with no refreshments to be one. Here\’s something to think about, you aren\’t celebs yet, why not supply your own refreshments, and do your own warm up. And if I was finding out if I\’d got a place in a competition that could change my life, I would be ready and waiting desperately for the information, and would definately be there in 24 hours. And, maybe you personally feel you have more talent than those put through, but I\’m sorry to say that the professionals obviously didn\’t. Why not stop feeling bitter, keep practising, and try again next time when you have improved. Or watch the show, and see how the other acts compare to yours. How could you improve? Either do that, and prove them wrong, or get over it!!!!

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